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On the Edge of the New Year

December 29, 2012

This 2013 New Year thing is really getting me thinking, pondering and wanting to write. Every year around this time I sit down and write a few things down, on paper, very old fashioned I know! Typically it starts with reviewing what I wrote the previous year and then I start writing about what I learned over the past year. Once that’s done I write about what I’d like to learn in the coming year. Rather than make resolutions, I send my intentions out to the universe, many times after I have reviewed my past year’s writing I find one or two of those intentions have come true. I feel like this year I have a big list so here goes some reflecting:

Last winter was tough on me, emotionally, I felt so exhausted, unmotivated, tired, cranky and just miserable. It took a bit of time for me to realize that the winter really affects me, as much as I enjoy sleeping in the dark (love love love it), the dark mornings and dark evenings really get me down. This winter I have taken steps to avoid that depressed feeling I had last year starting with regularly taking my liquid vitamin D drops, upping my calcium magnesium and taking vitamins. I have to say I feel 10000% better than last year. I actually wake up feeling rested and dare i say Happy. I like it, and I hope this feeling sticks around!

I currently work in an office as an admin person, and as much as i like my job I work with others that have a real negative energy (and vocally announce how much they hate their job). Until recently I didn’t realize the effect it was having on me. I came home every day  feeling it then spreading it out to my boyfriend, which is really unfair. Last week, when I was reading one of my old Oprah magazines they mentioned how to cope with a negative work space  leaving that negative shit at the door of the office, imagining putting in a box or in a balloon and letting it go. I am going to be working on doing this more often. I can’t change the people i work with but I can change my attitude. I like my job but my job doesn’t define who I am, it is a small part of me, I have always said the life I have outside of work is what matters most to me, my family, friends, volunteerism that’s what makes me me.

You know, even with out cable/satellite tv, I still watch too much internet tv. I have hobbies, crafts, things i’d like to work on but instead after work, i get home, make dinner, eat dinner and sit in front of the tv with my boyfriend (and we generally don’t talk much) until I go to bed. Worst habit ever. I am going to be limiting my tv and internet use when I get home. Real conversations happen when the TV is off, constructive crafting and learning is done when the TV is off. Must remember this fact.

Lastly, I realized how hard i am on myself. I set up these lofty goals, high expectations and when I can meet what I think I should I feel bad and stop trying. I have to be more realistic about where I am and take it slow. There are so many things I want to do, want to change, want to be that and it won’t happen over night. Small steps lead to bigger changes. I have to start smaller and work up.

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2 Comments
  1. You know what? That’s some really good reflection. I also work in an office that isn’t overly positive, and I came to a similar conclusion this year. I’ve also stopped going to all the outside of work functions that I have no interest in. As much as I think it’s a good idea to foster positive relationships with people I work with, I spend 8 hours a day there and 2 hours a day commuting to and from work. That’s enough of my life, and I have other stuff to do with the rest of it. Winter is tough – so is breaking the TV habit! I love me some TV in the evening!

  2. romanda permalink

    I found this year exceptionally hard and have also started the Vit D and Magnesium pill popping. It’s incredible how much it helped me too!

    Having goals is great – but it’s how you go about achieving them that is the challenging part of course. Remember, that just because you missed one day, or didnt do something you said you would on time, that you can get back on the wagon the next day. That is what shows you that you are not a failure .Don’t give up!!

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